So I thought on top of my mind this morning, specifically, what is it and how is it perhaps linked with our health, physiology, mentality, and how do we even keep track?
the ego and memory
So I think the ego anchors itself on our memories. To past numbers, past performances, or past states.
I think the reason why a lot of sports athletes like Michael Jordan gets so depressed is once you have reached the pinnacle, and you’re still alive… It must be insanely depressing, knowing that you’ll never reach that peak or summit ever again? And therefore they start to turn their efforts elsewhere, but, often not reaching the same level of mastery as they did in their first domain. For example, Michael Jordan and baseball golf, etc.
why does the ego matter?
The ego is our sense of self, kind of an operating system, which binds us together. Without it, nobody could function and live. And contrary to what other people think, I think that that you go is a sublimely, beautiful thing and vehicle, but I suppose it’s all about how you steer it.
the Antifragile ego
So if you think about the eagle, like some sort of biological organism, it experiences, wounds, injuries, maybe like a weightlifter or bodybuilder or sports athlete. Like when we have proper form or we don’t warm up or whatever… You could tear ligaments, dislocate things, break bones, etc. And in order to get back to your old state, requires interventions, healing, steroids, surgery, physical therapy, and a lot of time. Like if you are Kobe Bryant in your prime, think about all the ankle and ligament knee surgeries he has had over the years.
I think the way in which people quantify their ego is different based on their domain expertise. For example, artists in terms of their creative productivity, critical exclaim, etc. Actors and their roles, money managers, and their performances, sports athletes, and their wins and losses.
My theory is each, and every eagle seeks growth. And if it can no longer find growth in one domain, perhaps branches elsewhere?
Like for example… My first grand life mission was to become number one on Google for street photography, and I did it. And there’s a sense of gratification, knowing that I hit my target, and once you hit that target, it actually is not that important for me to maintain that goal, and then I could comfortably put my energies elsewhere if I want.
Probably one of the best things I did for my ego and self-esteem is deleting Instagram and social media, because once again… I demetricated my self worth and self esteem to arbitrary numbers.  and social media is really problematic because, it’s all kind of fake because you don’t know how many followers or likes are AI bots anymore, and the truth is having more social media numbers doesn’t mean that your ones and zeros in your bank account are going to go up.
Popularity and famous is also problematic because… You might see headlines and stuff, but it’s kind of an arbitrary thing. A lot of people have attempted to create scoreboards and ranking charts, but, I think fame is kind of more of an arbitrary thing in which individual has some sort of general self assessment of him or herself.
hormones and the ego
I think when your ego is wounded, it probably does something down for your hormones. It might affect your sleep, your physical, physiological health, certainly your mood, your general feelings.
Also, the tricky thing is… I think it is physiologically impossible for you to be super super up all the time, I think the human body requires fasting and waves, recovery, deep sleep, etc.… And also the general idea is you need some downs in order to go up higher.
I think the big intervention we are trying to do that is shortening the duration of being down, to perhaps close that negative feedback loop, and make it positive again? And how do we do that?
The first theory is, maybe identifying it. Like is your ego the issue? Are you quantifying your ego with some arbitrary measure? And or, is it a social issue in which it’s about how you’re treated and interacted with other human beings? Or some sort of social hierarchy?
Or is it capital or monetary or property related?
Or is it more of an existential thing in terms of your photography, creativity and art? 
Reformatting to zero
A child is not born with an ego, a child does have some sort of genetic programming which does dictate some stuff but, based on my observation at least with Seneca… Maybe 60 to 80% of how he interacts and how he talks is learned, socially through playgrounds and parks and school, other kids, friends, etc. And I think this idea of ranking or comparing or even quantifying is kind of a toxic thing that we teach kids early on in school. Like ideas of better or worse or having favorites is kind of more of an American first world thing. 
My first idea is, maybe it is a good idea to flush out your ego or reformat it every once in a while, kind of like how you do a deep flushing out of your pipes at home, reformatting your computer or your devices, taking it back to zero. One way you could do that is maybe think of your 12 year-old, 16-year-old, 18 year-old, maybe even your 21-year-old self before you were corrupted by the world and others. Because in terms of self assessment, we are trained to assess ourselves based on their opinions or the feelings of others.
distancing yourself more from others
I think this is a practical one is to distance yourself from other people, even the ones that you love. Why? I think a lot of of the expectations that other people even your loved ones have of you… will often cause you to go astray,  and taint your purity in terms of your own self motivation, your own self inner drive, etc. To be able to identify this and prune this is the first step to wisdom.
Physiology
My personal theory is 80% of depression is kind of a physiological one. Which means, much of physical depression could probably be overcome through intensive physical activity and exercise and weightlifting, hot yoga, long hikes in the great outdoors, feasting on beef, ribs and beef liver and juicy organ meats, deep sleep, and also disconnecting from media news and social media. It won’t fix everything but most of it.
the motivational ego
This is also a tricky one… I don’t think maybe the goal is to have a perfectly still tranquil and peaceful, serene Zen ego. But rather, ululations of difficulty which actually help you strengthen develop and augment your ego? So then… Ego tranquility is not the goal, but rather… Ego growth?
Seeking the good challenges
I’ll give you an example… To weightlifter or bodybuilder, our greatest Joy is waking up the next morning feeling sore, knowing that we had a good workout the day prior. And or, exerting our muscles to like 150%, and knowing that we gave it our all for a new one repetition, maximum personal record attempt. And then success and failure doesn’t even matter, but the joy of the full exertion.
wounds, which could be beneficial for growth?
If I think about my weightlifting journey, all of the injuries I’ve had whether minor or major, have helped calibrate me to refining my form technique, my warm-up, my methodology, etc. Taking it back to carte Blanche, ignoring all this nonsense on the Internet, and rather, kind of a more rigorous self experimentation, which has led me to lifting more than 2900 pounds.
tragedy as a fuel
Another thought about tragedies, they are not to be avoided or unexpected, but rather, developing some sort of godlike stoic disposition in which we could suffer the greatest of wounds, but after the supreme tragedy comeback stronger than ever?
Like for example, one thing which is actually quite puzzling or interesting to me is… Seeing how Donald Trump essentially lost maybe over $1 billion worth of properties, but even through that worst of tragedies, seems to be mostly unaffected? And then of course people will call him a psychopath and whatever… But I almost wonder… If having some sort of detached from reality mind could be a virtue? 
Even if you think about the stuff that Elon Musk has built, it is all from science fiction, and it seems impossible until he does it. Then it becomes a new normal and people will find another reason to berate him.
The ego on the deathbed
I think everyone wants to be on their deathbed, at peace, knowing that they lived a good life or a meaningful life. But maybe even on the contrary, perhaps I disagree? To die, satisfied, or totally at peace, is perhaps not the goal?
Because your legacy is not going to be remembered in terms of how your ego felt precisely at the moment of your death. Like you could be the most miserable person alive before you die, but if everyone remembers you as being a great individual with great contributions to society, and praises you, then your fleeting feelings, will not even really matter? The greater knowledge is knowing that you have children who will continue your legacy, hopefully grandkids, your writings, your artistic creations, whatever.
So then my thought is, focusing too much on your ego is not really that important? But rather, to simply delve deeply into your meaningful activities is what matters more?
I’ll give you an example… Elon Musk might be one of the most miserable people on the planet because he put so much pressure on himself to make humans interplanetary. That is like the world’s greatest task and attempt which is very uncertain. To put that level of pressure on yourself, is quite unhuman?
Miserable, but motivated?
Often setbacks can make us miserable… But they could also make us more motivated. More motivated to act, do, produce create, etc. and perhaps this is the greatest gift of all?
ERIC